Silly Picture Thread.

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[Jerry_Atrick]

erm.. I had something similar... Except no Tina. This used to be my cyling route to/from work about 15 years ago:

 

 

I was cycling down the main road coming out of Kensington, and the traffic was awfully gnarly.. But, I came across a small median strip in the road that I was able to mount without getting off the bike to get me to the front of th traffic lights (I normally am a very considerate and obedient rider, but traffic was going nowehere fast). I bolt along the 10 or 15 yards of the median strip and as I am slowing down for the red light, it turns green. Ship! So I hit tthe pedals and the median strip ends abruptly with a 6" or 1' drop - can't recall the exact height. So I decide to do a jump to get back on the road. 

 

Traffic wasn't moving anywhere, anyway. As I launch, I lift the handlebars slightly and it was a perfect landing with the rear wheel touching down first and the front one gently after it. As the front one lands, I push hard on the pedals to get away from any cars that may be inching forward from the traffic and back into the bus lane (cars are not allowed in it, and miraculously, there were no buses or taxis at the time). 

 

Problem was, this was no ordinary bike. It was below ordinary, as a cheapie racer from eBay. As I pushed hard down on the pedal, the chain jumper off the rear sprocket and wedged  telsef between two of them and was going nowehere. Of course, inertia kicked in as the pedal abruptly stopped its downward power stroke, and your truly kept going forward, in a most unaerodynamic way and I can't say my own landing was quite as graceful as I commanded the bike's up until that point. The small red circle I drew is about where it happened. 

 

As it transpires, in the friction fight between bitumen and skin, the bitumen won, and I had grazing all up and down one side. As I picked myself up in a hurry, bitching and complaining at tghe cheap ship from China, a young (and attractive) lady ran from the pavement to check if i was alight. "Yes, I am, thanks!" I retorted in a gruff voice, laden with a cocktail of angy and embarresed emotions, topped of with a decent serve of adrenalin (If I ever see her again, I will remember to apologise for my curtness). 

 

I kicked the chain onto its sprokcet and took off as fast as I could, still not feeling any pain. I have to say, adrenalin is a wonderful thing. I felt no pains and rode the stretch from the small circle to the elongated ellipse, probably as fast as I had ever ridden a pushie. I crossed Hammersmith Bridge and as I truned right onto Lonsdale road, the adrenalin started to recede - I had used up all my supply, I guess. The throbbing started, and it is a slight uphill, and I had a headwind. I am guessing it is nearly two miles. Each stroke felt like pushing against a hydraulic ram going the other way, and the throbs of pain amplified like rising tidal waves (it wasn't really that bad). When I got home and knocked on the door (the doorbell wasn't working), Mrs Atrick sternly asked where the hell I was to be so late (and i was about 5 or so mins longer than normal). I motioned her eyes to the red side of me... "I don't bloody care! I have two screaming kids that are driving me nuts. Id' swap for that any day of the week". 

 

Poor lady was at the end of her tether of a particulary tough day with the little-uns. 

 

[facthunter]

At weddings People used to include in speeches "and May all your Troubles be LITTLE ONES"  Nev

[pmccarthy]

I once came off a motorbike and grazed all my left side. Was a mass of bandages there. I walked into my home and stood with my left side hidden behind the door frame while I explained to SWMBO what had happened, then I stepped out. Ps I don’t count that as a bike accident I just opened the throttle too quickly on gravel from a standing start.

[facthunter]

You ride Motorbikes on and off then  I gather?  Nev

[red750]

10 hours ago, Jerry_Atrick said:

to check if i was alight.

At least the motorists could see you if you were alight.

[facthunter]

IF you did it really well it would be Brilliant.   Nev

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[Jerry_Atrick]

I am sure there's an app for it.

[old man emu]

 

[onetrack]

That machine fairly ripped him a new one!! 😄

 

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[ClintonB]

17 hours ago, onetrack said:

That machine fairly ripped him a new one!! 😄

 

imagine the upgrade on demtel or such, "you get stainless steel bristles for the price of nylon"

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[facthunter]

The problem was having TWO female rats. USA doesn't allow queer things.  (Just King ky ones).  Nev