red750

A girl about to turn 18 says to her father, "Dad, can I have a Ferrari for my birthday?" Her dad says, "Can you spell Ferrari?" She says, "F-E-R-A-R-I." Her dad says, "Sorry, that's not correct." She thinks about it, then says, "Well, can I have a Lamborghini?" Again her father says "Can you spell Lamborghini?" She replies, "L-A-M-B-O-R-G-I-N-I." Dad says, "No, that's not right either." This time she asks for a Porche, and agian her father asks her to spell it. "P-R-S-H." Dad says, "Sorry love, that's not right either." Finally, she says, "What about a BMW?"

Because it looks bloody ugly.

But you can take a sleeve off. I understand, but do't agree with the tribal tattoos, but anything else is desecration of your body, like pouring paint over Capt Cook statues. I know no-one else will agree with me, that's just my feeling. Just like I agree with scrapping a second safe injecting room in Melbourne. If they die of an overdose, that's their choice. No-one forced them to start taking drugs and get hooked.

RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE 1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. 2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. 3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen. 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair. 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, "In the lake." 8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off. 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" The driver said, "No, jump in!". 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce. 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was 'Always'. 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her. 13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!". Can't you just hear him say all of these? I love it. These were the good old days when humor didn't have to start with a four letter word or political. It was just clean and simple fun. And he always ended his programs with the words, "And May God Bless"with a big smile on his face.

When you read a book, it has been read, not red. But if you lead a horse, it has been led.

Not crows, but a interesting video....

World Naked Gardening Day is an event celebrated on the first Saturday of May of every year, and this year, it takes place on May 4. Gardeners from all over the world get together to attend to their plants and flowers wearing no clothes or shoes. This guy is overdressed.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13334467/Why-single-photo-Australian-suburb-sparked-huge-debate-future-country.html?ito=social-facebook

Not housing this time, but the trend conntinues: Major construction companies specialising in road building have collapsed, reportedly owing creditors more than $80million. Allroads Pty Ltd, a Brisbane-based civil construction company, and its subsidiary Allroads Plant went into administration on March 4. Administrators Darryl Kirk and Stephen Earel, who are partners at insolvency firm Cor Cordis, have now written a creditors' report outlining how both companies together owe $83million to almost 1,000 creditors.

Guilty as charged, although I do try to correct all the typo's this laptop insists on inflicting.

I never worked with someone had had a transormation, but I did work with a gay guy who was a nice enough bloke and did his job well. It was just some of the things he would say, like "laughing my tits off". My wife worked with a gay guy who lived with another bloke and their dog. He was a good friend to my wife, annd both attended her memorial service. There was another guy she worked with who always dressed like an executive at work, but we were invited to his birthday at his home, and he greeted us in a dress and high heels. I have no problem with them if they keep that side of their life at home. If they do a good job, there is no problem. If they constantly 'camp it up', it would turn me off. The thing I cannot accept, in males, females or whatever, is body modification or adornment. I dislaike tattoos on anyone, particularly women. It looks dirty, and on women, makes them look cheap. It's like keying a Jag. And piercinngs are a big no-no. A piercing on the earlobe of a female, with a small pin is OK, but rings through the nose, lip or eyebrow is definitely out. And the current fashion on Instagram, Snap Chat, etc., of balloon lips is hideous. No way:

Guys, forget dating sites.... Go onto Facebook marketplace and search for wedding dresses for sale......It will show you the profiles of recently divorced ladies in your area. From there you can even filter by size. 😁

An old guy, a young man, an old woman, and a young women are all riding in a train. The two women were facing the two guys in the same compartment. As the train was going crossing the countryside, it enters a tunnel, and everything becomes dark. While in the tunnel, you hear a K!$$$$$ then a Smack. When the train leaves the tunnel, the young guy is rubbing his face as if he was smacked. The old lady thinks: “He must’ve tried to k!SSSS the young lady and needed up getting smacked.” The young lady thinks: “He must’ve tried ki$$$$$$$$ing me and ended up ki$$$$$$!ng the old lady and she smacked him.” The young guy thinks: “The old guy must’ve tried to ki$$$$$$$$$$$ the old lady and she tried to hit him but hit me by accident.” The old guy thinks: “On the next tunnel I am going to ki$$$$$$$ my hand again and Smack the young guy again.”

They could give me the 72 virgins now, nothing I could do about. Cancer replaced the banana with a raisin 10 years ago.

Minus the "o".

Some sites have an online chat facility, where your question might be answered by AI.

Have you used their "Help" screens and asked how to change/update an email adddress?

Mehdi Hasan Lays Out First 100 Days Of A Second Donald Trump Term In Chilling Detail View the video here:- https://au.yahoo.com/news/mehdi-hasan-lays-donald-trumps-101410232.html

Yes Willie, it's a pity they are all not like this site or recfly. I had a look at my two banks and Facebook, and you need to be a bush lawyer. I realise the banks have to make it difficult for scammers so they don't milk you dry. I have a number of email addresses, some of which nnever get used. Only opened as a requirement of signing up to a website. Most requie the texted code which is pretty much the standard verification method these days. My first was with Optus, because we they were our ISP and cable TV service when my wife worked for them. The first one used my initial and surname as account name but it would get used maybe once a week, more often just spam. Then I opened one which was a bit more incognito, using my login from this site. Again, gets very little use. My main one is with yahoo.com.au. I also have a gmail.com account, which I only look at once or twice a year. All of them are free.

H was right spacey. B mirrored would look like this...