Quickies part 2

[facthunter]

People walking straight into a Post while on the Phone is more stupid. It's funny though, Post Humorously. Nev

[spacesailor]

face talk ,

You have to put that phone into a ' selfie-stick ' .Then you look more stupid. LoL

spacesailor

[red750]

At 85 years, Morris marries a lovely 25-year-old woman.
Because her new husband is so old, the woman decides that on their wedding night, they should have separate bedrooms. She is concerned that the old fellow could overexert himself. After the wedding festivities, she prepares herself for bed and for the knock on the door she is expecting.
Sure enough, the knock comes and there is her 85-year-old groom ready for action. They unite in conjugal union and all goes well, whereupon he takes his leave of her and she prepares to go to sleep for the night.
After a few minutes, there's a knock on the door and there old Morris is again, ready for more action. Somewhat surprised, she consents to further coupling, which is again successful. The octogenarian once again bids her a fond good night and leaves.
She is certainly ready for slumber at this point, and, after a few more minutes, is close to sleep. But for the third time, there is a knock at the door and there he is again -- fresh as a 25-year-old and ready for more. Again they ravish one another.
As they're basking in the afterglow, the young bride says to him, "I am thoroughly impressed that at your age you have enough juice to go at it three times. I've been with guys less than half your age who were only good for one time. You're a great lover, Morris."
Morris, looking quite confused, turns to her and asks, "You mean I was here already?"

[facthunter]

I GOT it.  Nev

[red750]

Here's another oldie.

 

A man was walking down the street when he saw a beggar sitting in a doorway, begging for money for a meal.

 

The man said, "If I give you $20, will you spend it on alcohol?"

 

The beggar replied, "No, I gave up drinking 18 years ago."

 

The man said, "If I give you $25, will you spend it on fishing?"

 

The beggar replied, "No, I sold my boat and fishing gear 15 years ago."

 

The man said, "OK, come home with me and my wife will cook you a nice homecooked meal, and I'll still give you the $25."

 

The beggar asked, "Won't your wife be angry?"

 

The man replied, "Maybe, but I just want her to see what a man looks like when he gives up drinking and fishing."