red750

HONEYMOON....
A  young couple left the church and arrived at the hotel  where they were spending the first night of their  honeymoon.

They opened the champagne and began  undressing. When the bridegroom removed his socks, his  new wife asked,

"What's wrong with your feet? Your toes  look all mangled and weird.

"I  had tolio as a child," he answered.

"You mean polio?" she asked.

"No,  tolio.   The disease only affected my toes."

When the groom took  off his pants, his bride once again asked

"What's  wrong with your knees?  They're all lumpy and deformed!" 

"As a child, I also  had kneasles," he explained.

"You mean measles?"  she asked.

"No, kneasles. It was  a strange illness that only affected my  knees." 

The new bride had to  be satisfied with this answer.

As the undressing  continued, her husband at last removed his underwear.

"Don't tell me," she  said.

"Let me guess... 

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Smallcox!

What a dag.

The Air Force May Have Actually Shot Down a Wholesome Ham Radio Balloon

Jumping at shadows...read this.

A man calls his wife from work: “Honey, my boss has asked me to go fishing with him for the weekend! This is a great chance to get in his favour, would you mind packing my bag so I can pick it up before we leave?”

“Sure,” she says.

So she packs for him and he leaves for the weekend. When he comes back, she asks him how his trip was and how many fish he caught.

“Fantastic, we caught trout, salmon and even a swordfish. The only problem was you forgot to pack my pyjamas,” he says.

“No I didn’t,” she says. “I packed them in your tackle box.”

Hand/eye co-ordination.

Raquel Welch passed away Wednesday US time, aged 82.

I have not been in a cinema this century. Don't watch  movies at home. My son and daughter have Netflix, Stan, et al, on the TV as well as Foxtel. Have not sat down to watch any of them. I do enjoy a couple of English mystery dramas - Midsomer Murders is a favorite, particularly the John Nettles ones. Also A Touch of Frost. I know! I'm weird.

My son was watching Maverick Top Gun the other day when I walked in. Watched about five minutes of it, when Maverick slammed Ice's wings into the top of his casket. That's about all. 

Russia just suffered a crushing defeat and lost an entire elite brigade

View slideshow here.

Putin 'pulls Russia's notorious Wagner Group troops' from Ukraine

Read Reuters report here (slideshow).

Simpler times.

Story and video here.

Having completed the 1450 a month early, I thought I'd have a shot at completing the 1500 by the end of Feb. I have most of the photos lined up, but a bug in the system is not recording the number of views. One photo uploaded recently has a thumb up reaction, but no recorded view. Three other aircraft uploaded in the last fortnight have no recorded views. I don't want to have unrecorded views, so I won't add more till the bug is fixed. Ian is investigating. 

We are used to seeing news reports about aircraft icidents and accidents, and they are always "Cessnas".

The same with military stuff. Many reports about the shooting down of balloons or other "objects", stating that they were shot down by an F-16, and showing photos of F-22 or F-35's.

"Michigan Congressman Jack Bergman told Fox News the mysterious "octagonal" object was shot down by a US Air Force F-16 fighter jet."  - Reuters.

Fred gets home late one night and his wife,
Linda, says, “Where in the hell have you been?”
“I was out getting a tattoo,” Fred replied.
“A tattoo?” she frowned.
“What kind of tattoo did you get?”
“I got a hundred dollar bill tattooed on my privates,” he said proudly.
“What the hell were you thinking?” she said, shaking her head in disdain.
“Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?”
“Well, for one, I like to watch my money grow,” said Fred.
“Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
“Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
“And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want.”

Little Johnny?

I see this morning that the new NZ Prime Minister has scrapped the Hate Speech laws proposed by Adern. These would have made it an offence to publish criticism of groups on the basis of race, sexual orientation or religion.

I also keep a spreadsheet, not detailed like Octave's, more a duplication of the bank statement. I know I can get this by logging on to the bank website, but sometimes that is not convenient. And if the balances differ, I can immediately see why, or will know I have been scammed.