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Posts posted by red750
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A Snart is a fart created when you sneeze. Release both ends.
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What is a "Snart?"
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John Cleese's name rhymes with cheese, not grease, because the family name WAS originally Cheese.
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Forensic investigator.
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Willie, I deleted your duplicated post for you.
I guess you could say I'm lucky. My son, aged 49, and my 43 year old daughter live with me, always have, and with the afforesaid GP's letter, my daughter is my carer and collects the carer's pension, although at times I think I am the carer.
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Australian actor Terry Norris (Bellbird, Cop Shop),passed away on 20 March, 2023, aged 92.
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Girl: "I left work today. I couldn't work for that man after what he said to me."
Boyfriend: "What did he say?"
Girl: "You're fired."
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When I was about 6yo, we lived on a farm near the junction of a small creek and a river.
One day, Dad said to me, "Get that kerosine tin from the back of the house and bring it around here."
As I lifted the tin, a tiger snake slid from under it, between my legs, and disappeared into the long grass. Dad looked for it but couldn't find it. On another occasion, one was found on the bricks laid at the bottom of the back steps. Our Dutch migrant farm hand killed it. This would have been around the late forties or early fifties.
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Big day today. Got the car. I spent a lot of time checking out finance companies/personal lenders, who offered loans of $4000 plus, but wouldn't lend $2000. One company would, but not to a retired person. Even the bank I have been with for over 25 years only lends $4000 and up. I said to my daughter, I want you to drive me to the bank, I want to speak to the loans officer and see what I can do. She shouted at me, "Alright. I'll lend you the money. You are driving me crazy!" She said my sons and her didn't want me getting the car, because they didn't think I was a good enough driver. Damn it, it pack death when I ride with them.
Anyway, now I have it. The dealer threw in the Gov't charges, so it cost only $4,000. It would not win any Concors de Elegance, but it runs beautifully. Engine is smooth, clutch is good, four good tyres, RWC, reg till January and 12 months warranty. Enjoyed the freedom and went and bought a $20 mill Super Jackpot lotto ticket. Even paid for that with the 9th div prize I won on Powerball on Wednesday.
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How could they afford newspaper?
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I looked at a number of Ford Focus advertised at the same price, but they were unregistered, no roadworthy, and private sellers, so no warranty. Apart from Gov't fees and stamp duty ($220) and insurance, I'd have nothing to spend on it for a while.
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47 minutes ago, facthunter said:
not the greatest driving experience in the world.
Nev, I'm not worried about a driving experience. An enclosed, heated/airconditioned mobility scooter which could take me to the men's shed, (currently 14 km, but soon to be 4 km if we move to the new location), would do just fine, but would probably cost as much. As I said I had one that I was happy with, and used it instead of the Falcon until an idiot in a VW Tourag van run into the back of it. My daughter drives a Festiva the same, and she could borrow this one if hers was off the road for any reason.
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Silly Picture Thread.
in Funnies
Posted