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octave

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octave last won the day on January 13

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About octave

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  1. This does not represent the women in my life does it represent the women in your life? My wife received nothing for complaining about being groped at table tennis and ultimately gave up doing something she loved. Of course not every allegation has merit but the notion that men are wonderful and it is evil women causing all the trouble doesn't stand up. The woman who went jogging in Ballarat and was killed is not an isolated event. As I have said I spent 30 years in tiny teaching rooms with people of all ages but mainly young girls and boys. I have never even had the hint of an allegation. I also co-managed a music school and other than the teacher caught with child porn (of the most hideous kind) never a problem. I suspect the overblown fear of being subject to an allegation has more to do with a backlash over changing social ways of interacting. It was suggested that my lack of problems in this area was due to luck. I would suggest it is due to understanding what is acceptable and what is unacceptable. I am definitely not saying men bad women good. I did present many examples of bad behaviour I have witnessed but often these things are justified as a joke or he doesn't mean to be groppy. The "you can grab them by the pussy and they cant stop you" thing is a belief I have come accross before I find it quite sad that this forum is only populated by older men but perhaps that is the way people here prefer it. Personally, I am looking for a forum that is a little more varied.
  2. Nomad, I am not sure where in my original post in response to the video I went into the subject of domestic violence. I was responding specifically to the video about men not wanting to work with women which I believe is exaggerated.
  3. Domestic violence perpetrated on anyone regardless of gender is terrible. The notion that women have an easy time reporting domestic violence or sexual violence I think is probably exaggerated. Certainly when female-on-male domestic violence occurs men are reluctant to report it. There are many biases and assumptions. People will say "If he or she hits you then why don't you leave" without considering the difficulties of that. The post I was reacting to was not actually about domestic violence but about men supposedly not wanting to work with women because they may be accused of something, that is what I am reacting to. I also call into question how strong feeling is amongst men. I have been looking at the research. 27% of men avoid one-on-one meetings with female co-workers. Yep, that’s right, almost a third of men are terrified to be alone in a room with a woman. or to put it another way 73% express no such reluctance. 21% of men said they would be reluctant to hire women for a job that would require close interaction (such as business travel). or 79% of men don't see a problem with this 19% of men would be reluctant to hire an attractive woman. or we could say that 81% of men would not be reluctant The 2018 survey results found that more than 10% of men and women said they expected to be less willing than before to hire attractive women. or put another way around about 90% did not think this.
  4. I don't recall having a reason to complain about anyone really, perhaps I just keep better company. Anywhere I have worked I have generally been like and respected. I can't think of any reason I would have had to complain. I don't know if it is luck. My first workplace was in the RAAF as a musician. When I joined it was male-only because of stupid crusty old conservatives. A couple of years later the first two women joined. For the most part, the smarter men were very accepting. There was a small group of insecure men who I guess thought their sacred space was being invaded. The worst occasion was when this group of male man boys organised to keep using the only toilet during break to prevent the women from using them. These women put up with this and actually went to the neighbouring units toilets. This eventually came to a head when one of the women dared to complain to the boss. The boss was furious and rightly had a go at these insecure idiots. I can remember after one of the ring leaders shouting in the woman's face "This is a mans airforce" I cleary remember the verbal savagery and the flecks of saliva flying out of this man's mouth. Of course, this was many years ago and these people are now reasonably friendly and the man I think is embarrassed. On another occasion, we were doing a parade rehearsal at ADFA in Canberra. Somebody (one of the officer cadets) dropped a tampon dipped in red paint just behind a female cadet. This kind of behaviour was rife back then and the victims did not feel they could complain. I believe later there was a scandal at ADFA where a cadet put a camera in the women's bathroom https://www.couriermail.com.au/ipad/defence-cadet-filmed-female-in-shower/news-story/7aca343b1ff5f785337f7febf81072e8 As a music teacher, I would be alone in a small room with a student. This was never a problem, I always behaved professionally. Over 30 years of teaching I am only aware of 2 instances of allegations made against teachers I worked with and they were wholly justified. https://www.abc.net.au/news/2009-09-03/teacher-tells-court-student-was-of-consensual-age/1415866 https://www.abc.net.au/news/2008-08-21/music-teacher-was-obsessed-with-child-porn-court/484678 I worked with both of these creeps. If you ask pretty much any woman they are likely to have stories about poor treatment. Things that they just are expected to put up with. I have related this story before. My wife joined a veterans table tennis club. There was an old guy there who was a good player and was giving advice but gradually started becoming a bit handsy. My wife started to dress in more baggy clothing so as not to encourage him. Eventually she brought it to the attention of the president. The vibe she got was, "don't make a fuss because he is a long-standing member and it will embarrass him". She left this club and went to another nearby club. At this club after a session the president asked to speak to the members, the males and females seperately. It turns out that a complaint had been made (not by the woman involved, she was just going to leave) but by a decent and brave man who had observed this and realised that the woman was embarrassed and upset. My wife gave up on activities where there were many older men. My wife spent many years working in an all-male environment and the men there were great. You guys would probably think my wife is an uppity woman. Standing with a 12-year-old student outside a music studio where she had just completed an exam a car drove past with a group of young men and one of them shouted "f*** her mate, I did." This kind of stuff still happens sometimes. In my wife case she resented the fact that it seemed to be her who had to carefully monitor her behaviour in order to not send the wrong signal (she was asking for it). It was also her responsibility to not hurt the man's feelings. I am sure most women can relate to this. Be pleasant so as not to be a stuck up b1tch but not do anything to suggest that she is interested in anything more. My objection to the video is because it presents women as the problem and men as the innocent victims. The truth is that there are some men and women who behave badly. In the case of my wife and table tennis she had to make the sacrifice and quit. The notion that I have been merely lucky by not having a girl or woman make a complaint against me doesn't really make sense. 32 years of being alone with a student and no a single complaint, this to me is not luck but professionalism. Other than the 2 teachers that I linked to I don't believe I know of a colleague that has had an allegation made against them. Sometimes myths build up that are greatly skewed from reality. Things have changed and I would say generally for the better. When I was in the RAAF if I had had a daughter I think I would have discouraged her from joining.
  5. Much exaggerated. Do you have problems in your relations with women? Perhaps by sheltered life you mean working with intelligent professionals. You seem to have a low opinion of women.,
  6. What a BS video. On what basis is the claim that "most men steer clear of female co-workers made" Are there statistics? Most of my working life has been working with younger folks the majority of them female. At no time did anyone ever complain about me. Perhaps I am just more socially competent. I also taught a majority of young females, teenage and adult women. Again in 30 years not a complaint. The video is very much men good women bad. The assertion that you can criticize men and it will be fine but not for women. Again not my experience of of my more recent workplaces.
  7. https://ny1.com/nyc/all-boroughs/news/2024/03/05/state-data-shows-rapidly-rising-sea-levels-in-near-future https://sealevel.nasa.gov/faq/9/are-sea-levels-rising-the-same-all-over-the-world-as-if-were-filling-a-giant-bathtub/#:~:text=No.,and Earth's uneven gravity field.
  8. Yep, it is 2 hectares or 5 acres
  9. We faced this when we sold our 44-acre plus house. We did our own valuation and whittled the CGT down to I think $1500. You can select the most valuable hectare to exclude and of course, you can deduct costs.
  10. Someone had to post it
  11. What an awful story but important to share
  12. To be clear I am generalizing and not specifically referring to you.
  13. I think an important ingredient in maintaining a connection with younger members of your family is the make sure you are the kind of person that they want to communicate with. Being a grumpy old curmudgeon doesn't really encourage contact.
  14. Malcolm Roberts, you must be joking. You only have to read Roberts comments on vaccination to realize he is a bit of a tosser.
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