red750

I got pinged for doing 45 in an 80 zone. It was 2:40 pm outside  school. School speed limits of 40 apply 2:30 to 4:00, even though schools get out at 3:15. My daughter has been a school crossing supervisor (at another school) for 15 years, and she never leaves home till 3:10.

A very refined lady goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel for her grandson’s birthday.
As she doesn’t know which one to get, she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.

A Wal-Mart associate is standing there wearing dark glasses. She says,
“Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?”

He says, “Ma’am, I’m completely blind; but if you’ll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes.”

She doesn’t believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.

He says, “That’s a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10lb test line. It’s a good all-around combination; it’s on sale this week for only $20.00.”

She says, “It’s amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I’ll take it!”

As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor.
“Oh, that sounds like a Visa card,” he says.

She bends down to pick it up and accidentally breaks the wind.
At first, she is really embarrassed but then realises there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who passed gas.

Being blind, he wouldn’t know that she was the only person around.
The man rings up the sale and says, “That’ll be $34.50 please.”

The woman is totally confused by this and asks,
“Didn’t you tell me it was on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?”

He replies, “Yes, Ma’am. The rod and reel are $20.00, but the Duck Call is $11.00 and the Catfish Bait is $3.50.”

Ziv News Live

The head of the Russian mercenary group Wagner, Yevgeny Prigozhin, led an open revolt against Moscow two months ago and broke it off at the last moment. Now Prigozhin is reported to have died in a plane crash. This reports the German news website tagesschau.de with reference to the Russian civil defense.

The accident occurred on August 23, 2023 in the Russian region of Tver, according to the country’s air authority. In addition to the mercenary chief, nine other occupants were also reportedly on the crashed plane. Among the occupants was the co-founder of the Wagner Group, Dmitry Utkin. All ten occupants died in the plane crash. Since there was an explosion on board and the bodies are badly burned, it will be some time before a clear identification is available.

The former Deputy Interior Minister of Ukraine, Anton Herashchenko, reports via Twitter, that some Wagner mercenaries have already spoken out about what will happen now. In a video they say: “”A lot of discussions about what Wagner will do in this situation. We’ll just say one thing: We’re starting off. Expect us!” What exactly is meant by this is still open.

Morgan Aero

Gordon Three Wheeler.

Rosie Hall buys a self-assembly, flat-pack, cupboard from her local Homebase store.  Reaching home Rosie reads the instructions carefully, counts the pieces then assembles the cupboard in the bedroom. It looks really great and she is delighted.
Now, Rosie lives near a railway line and as the train passes by the cupboard collapses.  Undaunted by this misfortune she re-reads the instructions and reassembles the cupboard.  Once more, another train passes and the whole cupboard collapses again.
Rosie now frustrated and thinking that she must have done something "wrong" re-re-reads the instructions and re-re-assembles the cupboard.  Shortly, a train passes and the whole cupboard collapses yet again for the 3rd time.
Rosie is now fed up, and rather angry. So she phones the customer service department.  She is told that this is quite impossible and that they'll send along a fitter to take a look.
The fitter arrives and assembles the cupboard.  Again, a train passes and the cupboard collapses.  Completely baffled by this unexpected event, the fitter decides to reassemble the cupboard and sit inside it to see whether he can find out what causes the cupboard to collapse.  At this point, Rosie's husband comes home, sees the cupboard and says, 'Oh, that's a splendid looking cupboard,' and he opens it to look inside.
The fitter, who had been wondering how to explain his position in Rosie's bedroom cupboard, blurts out, 'You probably won't believe me, but I'm standing here waiting for a train.'

Winston Churchill once said that: “democracy is the worst form of government – except for all the others that have been tried.” 

There were reports that it was shot down.

India has soft-landed on the Lunar south pole.

Another report:  Prigozhin Plane Crash

Apparently his 2/I/C was also on board. Will there be reprisals from his supporters?

Here is the report from the Guardian. Ch 7 news says his death has been confirmed by Russia.

Here is another report, from Ziv News Live:

 Putin loses his "General Armageddon", regarding Surovikin.

And the Ukranian Defense Ministry has claimed to have destoyed a tank convoy. Ukraine destroys Russian tank convoy

After I got over the initial shock, I looked again, and here is the breakdown.  I did misread a couple of things.

General Rate on $1,000,000 CIV     1415.35

Pension rebate rates                       -253.20

Fire Services Property Levy Fixed    125.00

Pension Benefit FSPL                       - 50.00

FSPL Variable rate                               46.00

Public Waste Service Charge              67.85

Kerbside  Waste Service Charge      184.80

Food and Garden Organics Bin           87.00

                                                         1,622.80

I looked up our address on Domain.com.au, and they quote the estimated value as $1,360,000. (mid range value.)

Sale history (when we bought it) Dec 1978, $50,500.

They offered the option of instalments on the last day of each month by direct debit for 9 months, basically $182 per month.

This suits me, close to me budgeting of $100 per pension day. ($200 per month.)

My daughter makes a batch of pies in a pie maker, and pasties in the oven. Those not used in the first meal are frozen, and thawed/reheated in the microwave. Only takes 2 or 3 minutes.

Correct - in this instance, it means RUSTY.

 = RUST, + Y = RUSTY.

Damned if I know who comes up with these puns...

Who will be first to get this?