Phil Perry

[ATTACH]49780._xfImport[/ATTACH] News just in. . .Apparently Julie Andrews will no longer be endorsing Rimmel Vibrant Shades Lipstick, as she claims that it breaks too easily and makes her breath smell. In a recent statement, she said, "The Super Colour fragile lipstick gives me halitosis"

[ATTACH]49776._xfImport[/ATTACH] BBC's 'Blexit Lobbin' . . . Relentless.

Terrifying Indeed ,. . .but Looking at the Current Democrat contenders,. . .are you really surprised ? ? ?

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I LIKE HIM BECAUSE HE IS A VERY FUNNY PERSON. . I Post this as evidence. . . . [ATTACH]49773._xfImport[/ATTACH]

Most people of my vintage mate,. . Don't own a 'Smartypants Phone,. . .very few use a computer and a lot of Them have no idea of how to do anything with it,. . unless they did Metalwork at school. . .(!) I do not need this facility, as I Already speak some German. Spanish, French, Clogger, Russian and Turkish. . .along with some insults in Farsi, Arabic, Hindi, Gujurati and Japanese. . . .Though I guess that a Translator 'APP' might save some trouble if I was in Brazil, and tried to order a breakfast and got Oysters Copacobana with Braised Squid and Lemon Ice Cream. .

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A friend, on trying to read the menu in a cafe,. . . once asked a French waitress, “qu’est-ce qui c’est Le Special du Jour?” To which she replied, ( in perfect English, ). . . . “it means. . ' today’s special Sir. . .'. Ya gotta LOVE English folk when they travel outside of Engerland. . . The very LAST item in their baggage,. . is a Phrase book, ALWAYS expecting those in Non English speaking Countries to understand them if they speak English S L O W L Y . . ..

Did you watch that TV documentary about Crew obesity in the Navy? It's got the biggest ratings.

So I said "Alexa, what do women want." That was 3 days ago. It's still talking. . . .

was always a dreamer when I was a kid. I told my mum I was going to make a bike out of spaghetti, She told me not to be stupid. . . you should have seen her face when I rode straight pasta.

Do Lumberjacks have to keep a logbook ?

Hey,. .. GREAT idea for Expat Pommies who still have an outside Dunny. . . . You can even get Star Spangled Bogroll now too. . . [ATTACH]49763._xfImport[/ATTACH] [ATTACH]49764._xfImport[/ATTACH]

An Afghan, an Albanian, an Algerian, an American, an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguan, an Argentine, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodian, a Cameroonian, a Canadian, a Cape Verdean, a Central African, a Chadian, a Chilean, a Chinese, a Colombian, a Comoran, a Congolese, a Costa Rican, a Croatian, a Cuban, a Cypriot, a Czech, a Dane, a Djibouti, a Dominican, a Dutchman, an East Timorese, an Ecuadorean, an Egyptian, an Emirian, an Equatorial Guinean, an Eritrean, an Estonian, an Ethiopian, a Fijian, a Filipino, a Finn, a Frenchman, a Gabonese, a Gambian, a Georgian, a German, a Ghanaian, a Greek, a Grenadian, a Guatemalan, a Guinea-Bissauan, a Guinean, a Guyanese, a Haitian, a Herzegovinian, a Honduran, a Hungarian, an I-Kiribati, an Icelander, an Indian, an Indonesian, an Iranian, an Iraqi, an Irishman, an Israeli, an Italian, an Ivorian, a Jamaican, a Japanese, a Jordanian, a Kazakhstani, a Kenyan, a Kittian and Nevisian, a Kuwaiti, a Kyrgyz, a Laotian, a Latvian, a Lebanese, a Liberian, a Libyan, a Liechtensteiner, a Lithuanian, a Luxembourger, a Macedonian, a Malagasy, a Malawian, a Malaysian, a Maldivan, a Malian, a Maltese, a Marshallese, a Mauritanian, a Mauritian, a Mexican, a Micronesian, a Moldovan, a Monacan, a Mongolian, a Moroccan, a Mosotho, a Motswana, a Mozambican, a Namibian, a Nauruan, a Nepalese, a New Zealander, a Nicaraguan, a Nigerian, a Nigerien, a North Korean, a Northern Irishman, a Norwegian, an Omani, a Pakistani, a Palauan, a Palestinian, a Panamanian, a Papua New Guinean, a Paraguayan, a Peruvian, a Pole, a Portuguese, a Qatari, a Romanian, a Russian, a Rwandan, a Saint Lucian, a Salvadoran, a Samoan, a San Marinese, a Sao Tomean, a Saudi, a Scottish, a Senegalese, a Serbian, a Seychellois, a Sierra Leonean, a Singaporean, a Slovakian, a Slovenian, a Solomon Islander, a Somali, a South African, a South Korean, a Spaniard, a Sri Lankan, a Sudanese, a Surinamer, a Swazi, a Swede, a Swiss, a Syrian, a Tajik, a Tanzanian, a Togolese, a Tongan, a Trinidadian or Tobagonian, a Tunisian, a Turk, a Tuvaluan, a Ugandan, a Ukrainian, a Uruguayan, a Uzbekistani, a Venezuelan, a Vietnamese, a Welshman, a Yemenite, a Zambian and a Zimbabwean . . . All go to a nightclub . . . The doorman stops them and says. . . . Sorry, . . . . I can’t let you in without a Thai.

I hear they’ve invented a new game, called ‘Quiet tennis’, it’s just like normal tennis,. . .. but without the racket.

Octave, are you in any way defending the ethos behind the installation of these Meters worldwide, other than countering certain aspects of their technology. ? This is definitely FINANCIALLY detrimentaL to the end user,. . .and following deeper investigation as to the reasons for their rapid installation throughout the UK and the USA, one has to wonder about the REAL reason for the worldwide installation campaign.. . other than Massive Profits and More Remote digital control of the population ? What is terribly wrong with the Old systems ? Not Profitable enough ? No cynical view at all ?

[ATTACH]49758._xfImport[/ATTACH] "So, why did you call him Digger ?"

My Daughter had a trip in one of the new Electric cabs in Birmingham yesterday.. . .She was very impressed at how smooth and quiet it was She said to the driver that she'd not traveled in an electric taxi before. He replied . . . . "Not Electric Lady. . .It powered with big battery. . . ." Doh...

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I have to admit that this facet of 'Smart' meters is new to me. The only thing that's sweeping the UK is what a bloody Scam they are. Dunno if the videos will be available in Australia, but if you search for The great Smartmeter Swindle, . .or, Smartmeter Scams, there are several detailed vids of how they are designed to up the rates during peak demand and rip you off, or even shut down your supply remotely. The last Two links mention the Health issues that you have described.

OI. . . .. . .emailed Ya Sport. . . .

I know. . .I know. . . My lady French Teacher had a fave joke ( ? ) She said,. . .What happened when Three French Cats went skating on the river Seine when the ice was Thin ? Je ne se pas Madame ? "Un Deux Trois Quatre Cinque . . " .she thought it was Tres Funny. . .

Why can a Frenchman only eat one egg? Because un oeuf is un oeuf.

I was walking in a shopping mall today when a Chinese bloke stopped me outside his shop and asked me if I wanted to look at his "crows shop" . "Crows shop", I replied, "Surely you mean clothes shop?". "no, no" he insisted, "It's a crows shop. Come in and take a rook"