PA.

So no movement equals no light.

On the subject of Toilet Humor,

I was on the toilet one night and my wife asked me, "Will I be long?" I replied, "No, those tablets I bought on the Internet haven't worked."

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No comment possible. . .

He made a grave mistake parking there.

I would go forward in time and see who turned up at my funeral.

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Reminds me of the time I was as the local swimming pool and thought I would have a sneaky pee in the deep end. Well the lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in.

If I had a 24 can slab of beer and someone asked for 2, how many I would now have?

24, he can buy his own beers.

Spotted in a house for sale picture.

28 Fairfax Road Mosman NSW 2088 - House for Sale #125080358 - realestate.com.au

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A young doctor moved to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older doctor suggested that the younger one accompany hiim on his rounds to introduce him to the community.

At the first house the woman complains “ I’ve been a little sick and have a sore stomach”

The older doctor says “well you’ve obviously been over doing the fresh fruit Mrs Smith, cut back on the amount you are eating and we’ll see if that does the trick.”

As they left the younger doctor said, “that was brilliant, you didn’t actually examine her but you came up with that diagnosis so quickly”

“I didn’t have to” the old man said, “you noticed I dropped my stethoscope on the floor? When I bent over to pick it up I noticed half a dozen banana skins in the rubbish, its more than likely whats making her sick”

“That’s clever” said the young doctor, “I’m going to try that”.

Arriving at the next house they chatted with a much younger, more attractive woman, She said that she just didn't have the energy she normally did and she was feeling really run down lately.

The young doctor said “You’ve probably been doing too much work for the church, maybe cut back a bit and see if that helps”.

The old doctor was impressed and said, I know that woman well and she is very active in the church and the community but how did you arrive at that diagnosis”

“I did what you did Doctor”, he said “I dropped my stethoscope and when I bent down to pick it up I noticed the minister naked under the bed”.

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We are now the forth most popular religion. Watch out Catholics, you are next on our list.

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On ya Tim. Always thinking big.

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We could hypothesize about this for infinity.

If anyone knows how to replace the cracked gray plastic sheath on Yamaha wiring I would like to know for a current project. Connectors on the end of each wire so you can't slide something on.

Lot of those older Buildings do have lower doorways. Isn't that what you mean. Don't want to bump your HEAD.

I remember once messing around near the canal when I was walking back from school. . . . Tell you what ! Mother hung me out to dry for that. . .

Look mum, I'm flying!

So began Phil's dreams of flight.

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I suffer from CDO, it's like OCD but the letters are in the correct order.

God's dirty dozen.

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Since when did it only require one council worker to dig a hole; it takes at least three.

There were two fellas working for the city council, one would dig a hole, the other would follow behind him and fill it in.

They worked furiously all day without rest, one guy digging a hole, the other guy filling it in again.

An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing.

So he asked the hole digger, "I appreciate the effort you're putting into your work, but what's the story? You dig a hole and your partner follows behind and fills it up again.

The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed, "Well, normally we're a three-man team, but the bloke who plants the trees is off sick today!"

This is the silly picture thread so a post must contain a picture or it wouldn't be silly.

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Reminds me of this classic Calvin & Hobbs.

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Here y'are....something to cheer you lot up....)

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Just curious ...

It looks like an old kit, yes/no? I believe they hold their value by NOT being put together?

I don't understand why men would want virgins......