Keep that brain working; try to figure this one out....See if you can figure out what these seven words all have in common?

 1 Banana

 2 Dresser

 3 Grammar

 4 Potato

 5 Revive

 6 Uneven

 7 Assess

 Give it another try....Look at each word carefully.  You'll kick yourself when you discover the Answer  This is so cool.....

Just to annoy you, I'll keep the answer until tomorrow. Give you time to think.

I like this one because I really enjoyed the book entitled 101 uses for a dead cat.

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A. One screw in the wrong place and the whole cabinet falls apart.

Off the wall stand-up comedy

Here's one my mate photographed on vacation. . . . If YOU have ssen some,. . .then maybe we have a good thread ?

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This was obviously designed by a British Government employee, whilst on vacation. . . . .? The British Government seem to have a serious problem with mathematics. . . . . . .

He sends me interesting pictures every day, but this one did make me laugh

British infantry regiments were the  in Victorian times were called "Regiment of Foot", hence "foot soldier". But where does "infantry" come from. It's a childlike word if you look up its etymology.

https://www.etymonline.com/word/infantry#etymonline_v_6431

"Rope in", in the sense of gathering in or enlisting, is a bold metaphor derived from the common practice of gathering the cut hay of a meadow by means of a long rope, drawn by a horse’.(orig. US, 1872)

How the hell do you get the sound "wun" out of "O-nn-eh"?

And another thing, why do stories start, "Once there was ...", or, "Once upon a time ..."?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

(And the answer isn't to get to the other side).

https://www.watoday.com.au/lifestyle/life-and-relationships/i-m-glad-you-ve-come-to-my-funeral-i-ve-got-a-few-things-to-tell-you-20240813-p5k215.html

I joined the group (Nev will be pleased), and posted a photo of how I spread my Vegemite. This was two days ago. So far, I have received 1,200 reactions.

Other off the wall rules require you to state your shoe size in your posts, and if posting a photo, include a banana for size comparison. Of course, not everyone does, many don't have a banana handy when taking the photo, but here is an example.

A Texas man legally changed his name to Literally Anybody Else and launched a campaign for president.

Else, 35, was formerly known as Dustin Ebey before beginning his quixotic quest with a legal name change in Tarrant County earlier this year, Dallas ABC affiliate WFAA reported. He said the judge wasn’t amused.

“This isn’t about me, Literally Anybody Else, more so as it is an idea,” he told the station. “We can do better out of 300 million people for president.”

Else said his goal is for people to look at their ballots and see a list of three options: Donald Trump, Joe Biden and Literally Anybody Else.

Getting on the ballot in every state as an independent candidate will be a challenge for Else, who faces tight deadlines and stiff petition requirements.

However, some polls would suggest he could have crucial name recognition. An early March ABC/Ipsos poll found 36% of people believed Trump would do the best job as president and 33% preferred Biden, but 30% picked “neither.”

“People are voting for the lesser of two evils, not someone they actually believe in or support,” Else told WFAA. “People should have the option to vote for someone who resembles and represents them, not the lesser of two evils. I reject that.”

Else has filed with the Federal Election Commission and set up a campaign website to share his opinions. Now he just has to get Everybody Else on board.

Sit in a chair and raise your feet.

Rotate your feet clockwise.

Rotate your feet anti clockwise.

Rotate your feet in opposite direction to each other.

Not too hard, right? Now the hard bit.

Rotate your feet clockwise and rotate your hand anticlockwise without your foot changing direction. It's impossible.

Walking can add minutes to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old
To spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
Home at $6,000 per month.

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My grandpa started walking
Five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
And we have no idea where the hell he is.  
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I like long walks,
Especially when they are taken
By people who annoy me.

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The only reason I would take up walking
Is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.  
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I have to walk early in the morning,
Before my brain figures out what I'm doing...

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Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

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I do have flabby thighs,
But fortunately my stomach covers them.  
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The advantage of exercising every day
Is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, he looks good doesn't he.'

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If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
Start with a small country.  

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I know I got a lot of exercise
The last few years,......
Just getting over the hill.

If you have watched the video, go an check the number of days ago that it was posted and think about when that actually was.

I wonder how sheepish he felt, when he was caught?

https://www.perthnow.com.au/news/murder-tries-to-escape-maximum-security-prison-disguised-as-a-sheep-c-9776009

Nominee No. 1: [San Jose Mercury News]:
An unidentified man, using a shotgun like a club to break a former girlfriend’s windshield, accidentally shot himself to death when the gun discharged, blowing a hole in his gut.

Nominee No. 2: [Kalamazoo Gazette]: 
James Burns, 34, (a mechanic) of Alamo, MI, was killed in March as he was trying to repair what police describe as a "farm-type truck." Burns got a friend to drive the truck on a highway while Burns hung underneath so that he could ascertain the source of a  troubling noise. Burns’s clothes caught on something, however, and the other man found Burns "wrapped in the drive shaft."

Nominee No. 3: [Hickory Daily Record]:
Ken Charles Barger, 47, accidentally shot himself to death in December in Newton, NC. Awakening to the sound of a ringing telephone beside his bed, he reached for the phone but grabbed instead a Smith & Wesson 38 Special, which discharged when he drew it to  his ear.

Nominee No. 4: [UPI, Toronto]:
Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety of windows in a downtown Toronto skyscraper crashed through a pane with his shoulder and plunged 24 floors to his death. A police spokesman said Garry Hoy, 39, fell into the courtyard of the Toronto Dominion Bank  Tower early Friday evening as he was explaining the strength of the building’s windows to visiting law students. Hoy previously had conducted demonstrations of window strength according to police reports. Peter Lawson, managing partner of the firm Holden Day  Wilson, told the Toronto Sun newspaper that Hoy was "one of the best and brightest" members of the 200-man association. A person has to wonder what the dimmer members of this law firm are like.

Nominee No. 5: [The News of the Weird]: 
Michael Anderson Godwin had spent several years awaiting South Carolina's electric chair on a murder conviction before having his sentence reduced to life in prison. While sitting on a metal toilet in his cell attempting to fix his small TV set, he bit into  a wire and was electrocuted.

Nominee No. 6: [The Indianapolis Star]:
A Dunkirk, IN man, using a cigarette lighter to check the barrel of a muzzleloader, was killed Monday night when the weapon discharged in his face, sheriff's investigators said. Gregory David Pryor, 19, died in his parents' rural Dunkirk home at about 11:30  PM. Investigators said Pryor was cleaning a .54 caliber muzzle-loader that had not been firing properly. He was using the lighter to look into the barrel when the gunpowder ignited.

Nominee No. 7: [Reuters, Mississauga, Ontario]:
A man cleaning a bird feeder on the balcony of his condominium apartment in this Toronto suburb slipped and fell 23 stories to his death. "Stefan Macko, 55, was standing on a wheelchair when the accident occurred," said Inspector Darcy Honer of the Peel Regional  Police. "It appears that the chair moved, and he went over the balcony," Honer said.

Nominee No. 8: [Arkansas Democrat Gazette]:
Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday. Woodruff County deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday.
Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc, and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock, were returning to Des Arc after a frog-catching trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's pickup truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the  older model truck had burned out. As a replacement fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullets from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering wheel column. Upon inserting the bullet the headlights again began to  operate properly, and the two men proceeded on eastbound toward the White River Bridge.
After travelling approximately 20 miles, and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged and struck Poole in the testicles. The vehicle swerved sharply right, exited the pavement, and struck a tree. Poole suffered only minor  cuts and abrasions from the accident but will require extensive surgery to repair the damage to his testicles, which will never operate as intended. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released. "Thank God we weren't on that bridge when  Thurston shot his balls off, or we might be dead," stated Wallis.

"I've been a trooper for 10 years in this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I can't believe that those two would admit how this accident happened," said Snyder.

Upon being notified of the wreck, Lavinia Poole (Poole's wife) asked how many frogs the boys had caught and did anyone get them from the truck?

So, I will start... Today, at work, in an instant messaging chat with a female colleague, we were boasting about our most bebaucherous drinking experience. At the end of the conversation, I thought I would be funny and say, "After all that, I have decided I need a new liver".. Sadly, as you guys know, I have a few typos now and then.. and the "o" is next to the "i".. There was radio silence and then.. "What will your partner think?"

"Here I am... Brain the size of a planet..."

Name four days of the week starting with "t".

The drum that a sideshow spruiker beats to attract a crowd to be fleeced.